Alcohol consumption is an undeniable staple of college culture.
From John Belushi's iconic sweater in "Animal House" to Natural Light's "Naturday" advertisements on Nicholson Drive, drinking and college have always gone hand in hand.
Combine students' love for alcohol and lack of cash and you get one of the greatest college promotions ever — free drinks.
You might think you're an experienced drinker from funneling the high gravity lager of Steel Reserve or taking eight consecutive tequila shots during high school.
I don't care if you drank a 40-ounce of O.E. after school every day or if you can do a three-minute keg stand.
If done properly, free drinks will put you out.
The "free drinks" special can be found in all of your favorite Tigerland bars this summer and throughout the school year.
The bars alternate the special so that it occurs every day of the week. Sadly the drinks are not completely "free."
If you don't know the drill, you pay $5 to $10 to get as plastered as possible in two hours.
All of your standard drinks are available, albeit they are the lowest shelf liquor possible.
I don't know if they provide wine, but if they did it would be the vagrant water that is Mad Dog 20/20. So don't expect any Grey Goose or Patron.
This is the dirty stuff.
A big catch to free drinks is its usual 8 p.m. start time. After 120 minutes of slamming bottom of the barrel whiskey and colas you should start buzzing like Ron Artest after the Lakers won the title.
Some people will just go home after 10 p.m. rolls around and the free drinks end.
But most will stay at the bar or move to another one to continue the annihilation party for four more hours until 2 a.m., in which case the free drinks serves as a glorified, unequaled pre-gaming affair.
This whole concept may seem too good to be true. Of course there are some negative aspects to free drinks.
One is the overtly blaring Top-40 rap music that most of these bars spin.
At one unnamed freshmen-flocking establishment, I couldn't even think to myself because of the cheap synthesized auto-tune and rancid vulgarity leaking out of the amplifier placed right above my barstool.
Another issue is the crowd. Since the special goes on during the bar's early hours, a shortage of bartenders is quite common as fellow binge drinkers fight for attention.
It's up to you to decide how much to tip the bartender, but that may help your chances of stuffing five more drinks in when 9:55 rolls around.
And dudes, the majority of the patrons are going to be guys.
On a good night, there may be balance in the sex ratio, but for the most part it's a male-dominated pre-game before the real night starts.
It is very easy to over indulge in alcohol when it is so freely available.
So watch your intake, or you could very well end up in a shuffling stupor in the bar, finishing in an expulsion of gin and tonic to the porcelain gods.
We've all been there.
And definitely don't drink and drive.
It's pretty funny to see the way universities try to downplay the amount of binge drinking when epic specials like these are offered within a stone's throw of campus.
Free drinks clearly promotes heavy drinking and an affordable way at that.
It's like an all-you-can-eat buffet, except instead of gorging yourself with powdered Chinese donuts, shrimp and noodles, you're doing it with grain alcohol and stale Natty.
I'm paying my $5. I'm getting my money's worth and then some.
Free drinks are the best bet you can get for drinking cheap in Baton Rouge.
For related experiences, please see Ms. Mae's in New Orleans.
--
Contact Cory Cox at ccox@lsureveille.com
is a member of the 
1 comments
Skeletor BoJangles